There's No Place Like Home

A well-known morris-dancing singer is said to have purchased a record-breaking new home this week. The 3760008 acre estate, situated at an undisclosed location, is equipped with 9 exoskeleton-themed bathrooms, a scale model of the Hindenburg which doubles up as a handy buffet table, 2 original artworks featuring the decorated bodies of unknown homeless people, and of course a lacrosse court in every room.