Your Whores
Looking for work? Why not become a prostitute?
With excellent conditions and competitive salaries, prostitution is a growing industry with still many attractive opportunities for the desperate. Little to no pride left? Give us a call. Go on - you can take a beating occasionally*.
*Your Whores accepts no responsibility for unpredictable variety in violence frequency.

Archie's Magazines:
Archie presents a selection of specialist titles for the more discerning bachelor:
Mewing Nuns; Sarcastic Chefs; Silly Silly Silly; Moistened Elbows; BIG Toes; Teenage Earlobes; Cats in Shoes; Socks n' Guns; Photographs of Chewing Gum Stuck in Rich Ladies' Hair; Nipples Covered by a Crisp Packet Still With Some of the Flavouring on it.

MOBILE PHONE ACCESSORIES!!!
Buy a load of stuff for your MOBILE PHONE!!! Pay just £19.99 for a catalogue telling you all about this great stuff for your MOBILE PHONE. With all the latest ring-tones etc for your MOBILE PHONE. Includes a selection of fucking hats or something.